Jun 042016

I suppose most people reading this is familiar with Abdul Goldberg. If not, let me Google that for you. A while ago, the Emporium of Rogue Dreams (on Facebook, that) joined in a collective challenge to create our own visions of Abdul Goldberg. I must be honest and say, this isn’t really my vision of Goldberg… it’s a bunch of stuff that I managed to fit together and shoehorn into the assignment. It’s ONE interpretation of Abdul Goldberg. I could make many more. So… who is this Goldberg, then?

It's simple, Paulie. Hand over the datafax and nobody gets hurt.

It’s simple, Paulie. Hand over the datafax and nobody gets hurt.


Abdul Goldberg, huh? Let me tell you, that guy is as oldschool as they come! He’s been around as far as I can remember – but don’t let the outrageous clothing and graying beard fool you. Goldberg is not to be trifled with! While not completely without scrouples, in his days he have widowed more than he have wed. Those guys all had it coming… mostly.

I’ve always said it’s a blessing he’s a good guy at heart. It’s more than can be said about that green beast perched on his shoulder. What kind of freak gyrinx have wings?! An evil, vicious, insidious and utterly soulles bastard of a gyrinx, that’s what kind.

Gotta say though – since he settled down on McKemmler IV it seems like Goldberg found some sort of peace. We don’t run accross him as much, his crew isn’t jacking shipments or blasting other outfits the way they used to. I don’t know – maybe he’s planning something big, rumour has it he’s working with The Blacksmith… or against him. Blazes, I even heard some people claim that Abdul Goldberg is the freaking Blacksmith. Ha!

So there you have it kid. Goldberg… nobody knows where he’s from, and right now it seems nobody but he knows where he’s going. Exciting times, huh?!


An aging space scoundrel enjoying a space cigar...

An aging space scoundrel enjoying a space cigar…


With not much of the deadline left when I started the task, I first opted for a classic Rogue Trader figure without any conversion work… but I have had this idea about converting up this Reaper Bones pirate into a rogue trader.  I thought he’d fit just fine as an Abdul and sat down outside with a cigar and my (rather paltry) bitz box.

The first few rough steps.

The first few rough steps.

It started with a Reaper Bones Barnabus Frost model (see top left above). To space him up a bit, I figured he could use some Space Marine legs so out came the 90s marines I haven’t been able to flog for more than a year (top right). A few cuts and snips, and I found myself with the beginnings of a slightly dismembered rogue trader.  To see if it’d work, I used (white) blu-tac and a RTB01 beakie for reference (bottom right above). I was pretty satisfied with where I had gotten in about an hour’s time (which mostly consisted of humming and hawing).

Finished conversion work.

Finished conversion work.

I then continued with adding bits and pieces, and I even got to break out the green stuff. I’m not very experienced with green stuff so it’s always a bit disconcerting. But things turned out pretty fine… Here’s a run-down of the other parts used: The sword blade of an Hero Quest goblin, a plasma pistol and a power sword hilt from the old Ork Heavy Weapons sprue, and a bat-winged cat from Axiom/Jon/Beastface Miniatures. Finally I greenstuffed a cigar, knee pads, some details on the sword and a handguard to strengthen the joint where sword blade met hilt and hand.

The finishing touch to the competition entry was to stat the guy up in Rogue Trader. It was pretty straight forward stuff. As I’m not a grizzled veteran of RT, I only used what I could see on the model – with the exception of some smoke grenades that I figure old Abdul carries in his fanny pack if ever he needs to hastily abscond with some loot or other.


Yeah, I know – it’s not “legal” with a Cool of 10 if the model isn’t a psyker. I’m pretty sure Abdul don’t care, and neither should you…


May 082016

Martin (of Shamutantis fame) and I got together for another game of Pulp Alley a little while ago. Once again, good times and many laughs were had so it’s looking to become as regular a fixture as our child laden family lives can allow. Next time, I’m heading to Copenhagen for some Rogue Trader skirmishing. Looking forward to that!


It was early morning yet, as Conrad Moon and his bruteish entourage made their way through the underbrush. It had been a long search, but it finally seemed like he would be able to lay hands on a fabled idol of the Raizze, the indigenous race of the forest moon Luis Rey Prime.


Unbeknownst to Conrad, scoundrel Morton “Balls” Fieldmann had overheard the drunken boasting of Demp and his ork goons at the space port cantina. Hoping to claim the idol and deliver it to the dreaded Blacksmith on McKemmler IV, Balls was now being escorted by the local Raizze chieftain and his closest warriors, under the false pretense of him wanting to help them fend off the outisder raiders and save their valuable cultural heritage.


An overview of the table.

An overview of the table.


Both groups have the same goal – get their mitts on the golden idol (the major plotpoint). A few generic boxes of supplies make up the minor plotpoints, together with a white crate containing a jetpack (extreme peril to take off and then an extreme peril to land anywhere on the table) and a stone statue with ruby ingots for eyes.




Balls ascended the ziggurat on one side, while Conrad Moon and his closest “men” approached it from the other side. The raizze tried to block off Demp from the divine statue in the clearing, but fell in the ensuing firefight. In the meantime, one of the orks was left behind to fiddle with the jetpack while the other two headed for a crate of supplies.



One of the raizze made the mistake to bum rush Demp, who was a very adept brawler.



Ork muscle Gumbah and Larma rushed to secure a box of… supplies.



Balls reached the summit first, and managed to uhm… “rescue” the golden idol – much to Conrad’s chagrin.



Demp was so tempted by the ruby eyes of the sacred statue that no amount of raizze could stop him from prying them loose.



With a bit of luck, Balls manage to put the ziggurat summit between himself and Conrad Moon – eager hands clutching the golden idol.



The last one of the three raizze troopers (and their lizard dog) standing tries to bring down Demp, with little luck.



Balls and the raizze chieftain defend the golden idol against the orks Gumbah and Larma, managing to fell Gumbah.



In the last turn, Conrad and Zyph attempt to take down Balls, while Demp continues schooling space lizards in the fine art of pugilism. He managed to take out three troopers and the lizard dog all by himself. Fenk is (very bravely) hiding behind some shrubs with his shiny new jetpack toy.



Despite a heroic last effort from Conrad Moon and his henchmen (henchorks?) Balls and the raizze chieftain manage to slip away. Not much later, the raizze leader surprisingly finds himself abandoned in the wilds with Balls travelling back to civilization all on his own.


We played a generic smash and grab scenario, which I feel really shows hos the game work. Dash for the plot points with your strongest guys, throw the weaker red-shirts under the bus as speed bumps. We had a good time, and decided to play a quick follow-up to this game the same day. A short report on that will be up next. In the long run, I’m still undecided as to whether PA is a game to stick with or not… It’s fun, but I get a feeling that there’s not enough consequence to the in-game action. Especially the leaders are nigh invulnerable and recover easily. Also, after a game there’s very little chance you’ll get any form of increase on any model (or the league itself) which means a campaign is pretty slow going.

Feb 202016

It’s been a long while since I played a game, but today I got the opportunity when fellow Oldhammer Forumite  Martin visited from Copenhagen. Since it was our first playdate, we figured something light and easy would compliment the obligatory rummaging through Mount Lead, shuffling through old rule sets and general nerd banter.

We decided to go for Pulp Alley (albeit in space), and I had a scenario half prepared.

Captain Morley and his crew have returned to McKemmler IV with some contraband to unload. In their cargo hold lurks the most recent addition to Morley’s menagerie; an astro badger! Alas, the astro badger somehow manages to escape the Chaste Magpie and skedaddles off into the ruins of Foundation City (the inaugural colony set up when the first colonists came to McKemmler IV). As they set out to find the lost pet, they’re alerted to the presence of another crew. Marty “Balls” Fieldmann and his cronies from the Blacksmith’s crew! What a surprise, considering Astro Badger Crock is the Blacksmith’s favourite dish.

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The two groups deployed in opposite corners of the table, for the Trail Of Clues scenario.

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Morton “Balls” Fieldmann (hiding in the shrubbery) is joined by sidekick Bodnia and three allies Franke, Tonny and Radovan. The follower “That” have just acted, moving towards the first plot point. I commanded these guys.

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Captain Morley (in blue) and co-pilot Stickney (sidekick, in red) are backed up by clone brethren merc Wagoner, Cuera and Dawleen (allies). At their side, trusty radipus Bil (follower). Martin played these.

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Perched on a roof near the Morley crew was Vuk the snitch. If anyone had seen the animal, he’d be one to know.

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Near the other gang was an old security droid which (if hacked) could help in tracking the badger down.

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Morley and Stickney wasted no time and in their first turn, they charged forward guns blazing. The nameless horror from the rad wastes only known as “That” fell and was knocked out.

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Radovan soon repaid in kind, and Bil the radipus was dispatched of.

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With one plot point secured, the wasteland raiders started applying some pressure on the battle clones, but they held their own long enough to allow Dawleen to climb the ladders and reach Vuk the snitch.

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With neither team managing to secure more than one plot point each, and the game coming to a close, Balls charged Morley for a clash between the two leaders.

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Near the end, the gangsters and smugglers can only look on in dismay as one of the plot points wanders off with the much coveted astro badger!

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Paulie Papers, ever the opportunist! Only you would be so bold, absconding with the prize right under the nose of the warring factions.

In summary – we had a great time! Plenty of old lead was fondled and oogled, Martin managed to liberate me of some junk… err, treasures I’d been hoarding and an exceedingly even game was enjoyed. Though I did manage to do rather well with the dice for a while, which probably saved my hide more than once. We both lost a single ally and our respective followers. Both of us secured a minor plot point each and neither of us were in a position to try and claim any sort of moral victory over the other. In other words, a perfect introductory game!

Hopefully, we’ll have opportunity to soon revisit McKemmler IV for the next thrilling chapter in the quest for the delectable but ever-elusive astro badger! I have been painting orcs for a rather famous old scenario pack for Warhammer too… it might be we get to play the first scenario from that before we do any more Pulp Alley.